Finding the Way

As you start to walk on the way, the way appears. - Rumi

When it comes to the unknown, it is only human to size-up our surroundings,

to proceed with caution,

and to prepare to protect ourselves.

But when our perspective is colored, patterned and shadowed

by the troubles held in our hearts and minds,

we can't see clearly. We can't see reality. We don't see what is Real.

Fear blurs vision.

Worry distorts the present.

Anxiety demands an about-face, turning us away, never to know what is around the corner.

Suddenly, we can't seem to find a way to move forward.

And in this moment, we don't need to be grasped and shaken into thinking differently.

We need to be held. To be comforted. To be reminded.

“Do not let your hearts be troubled," Jesus says in John 14:1.

Almost immediately, "Doubting Thomas" - i.e., insert our own names: "Doubting ___________" - asks the question, "...how can we know the way?"

And it's as true for the disciples of Jesus as it is for us:

“We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are.” ― Anaïs Nin

Patiently, Jesus uses history and analogy and mystery in His Words:

"...you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. The one who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them.” John 14:20-21

And when we have this Love? this Presence?

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27

The word for worry often used in scripture, “mirimnao” combines two Greek words ‘merizo’ which means ‘divide’ and ‘nous’ which means ‘mind.’ Worry means "divided mind."

And since heart and mind are used interchangeably in scripture, we can read with an expanded understanding:

Teach me your way, Lord, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name. Psalm 86:11

When we are aware of the divided mind, the disordered mind, the fragmented mind,

we have an opportunity.

We can inquire about options.

We can consider choices.

We can communicate with the Creator and contemplate His desire for us:

to Live with a mind that is whole, united, full.

We can use Mindfulness as a way to Peace.

Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones. - Thich Nhat Hanh

One way to help us learn to think differently incorporates a process called dialectics.

Dialectics is based on the concept that everything is composed of opposites, and that change can occur when "dialogue" happens between these opposing forces.

The basis is the understanding that all things are interconnected,

that change is constant and inevitable,

and that opposites can be integrated to form a closer approximation of the truth.

In essence, dialectical behavior therapy helps us to recognize, regulate and relay our feelings.

Instead of feelings frightening us, freezing us or causing us to flee,

feelings of fear, worry and doubt can be named, tamed and not shamed - but expressed!

After all, the most basic function of fear is to assure our survival - to keep us on the way! -

not to lead to our demise.

It's in the History, the analogy, the mystery.

Jesus used His words,

His life,

His death,

His transformation

and His presence to remind us. To Re-Mind us that there is another Way to Live.

Transforming our thinking is summarized in another way by Thich Nhat Hanh:

The first step in dealing with feelings is to recognize each feeling as it arises...look at your fear, and recognize it as fear.  You know that fear springs from yourself and mindfulness also springs from yourself.  They are both in you, not fighting, but one is taking care of the other. The second step is to become one with the feeling.  It is best not to say, "Go away, Fear.  I don't like you.  You are not me."  It is much more effective to say, "Hello, Fear.  How are you today?"  Then you can invite the two aspects of yourself, mindfulness and fear, to shake hands as friends and become one.  Doing this may seem frightening, but because you know that you are more than just your fear, you need not be afraid. As long as mindfulness is present, you will not drown in your fear.  In fact, you begin transforming it the very moment you give birth to awareness in yourself. The third step is to calm the feeling.  As mindfulness is taking good care of your fear, you begin to calm it down... (just like) a mother holding her baby is one with her baby.  If the mother is thinking of other things, the baby will not calm down.  The mother has to put aside other things and just hold her baby.  So, don't avoid your feeling.  Don't say, "You are not important.  You are only a feeling."  Come and be one with it.  You can say, "Breathing out, I calm my fear." The fourth step is to release the feeling, to let it go.  Because of your calm, you feel at ease, even in the midst of fear, and you know that your fear will not grow into something that will overwhelm you.  When you know that you are capable of taking care of your fear, it is already reduced to the minimum...  Now you can smile at it and let it go, but please do not stop yet.  Calming and releasing are just medicines for the symptoms.  You now have an opportunity to go deeper and work on transforming the source of your fear. The fifth step is to look deeply.  You look deeply into your baby--your feeling of fear--to see what is wrong, even after the baby has already stopped crying, after the fear is gone.  You cannot hold your baby all the time, and therefore you have to look into him or her to see the cause of what is wrong.  By looking, you will see what will help you begin to transform the feeling.  You will realize, for example, that the suffering has many causes, inside and outside of the body.  If something is wrong around the baby, if you put that in order, bringing tenderness and care to the situation, the baby will feel better.  Looking into your baby, you see the elements that are causing him or her to cry, and when you see them, you will know what to do and what not to do to transform the feeling and be free.

The Word of Life and words of truth can remind (Re-Mind) us,

can re-wire us,

can re-connect the divided mind and bring it to healing, to wholeness, to holiness.

Repeating truth re-orients us and re-unites with God, our Holy Parent,

Who brings tenderness and care to our situations,

Who looks deeply into us,

Who sees us and transforms our feelings to enable us to feel freedom as we focus on His Goodness.

When I am afraid, I put my trust in You.

In God, whose word I praise—

in God I trust and am not afraid. Psalm 56:3

And not only can we learn to feel Peace in our present,

but we can rest in the promise of Peace in our future.

“If we can relax when our strong emotions come, then we don’t pass fear on to our children and to future generations.” Thich Nhat Hanh, Fear: Essential Wisdom for Getting Through the Storm

This Way is for our Good.

“You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.” Isaiah 26:3