Inviting Grace

God...gives grace to the humble. James 4:6

When it comes to the Holidays and holy days, gatherings are scheduled, preparations are made, and the guest list is formed!

And when it comes to the holy days and Holidays, we need to make room.

Make room, because it's human nature to arrive with our cornucopia of emotions, baskets of feelings and platters of life events - all in one home. All in one room. All around a table.

And these emotions as "guests" can sometimes make the table feel overly crowded and potentially overwhelming. (There are so many of every type!)

Sometimes a simple "feelings wheel" can be helpful to identify which feelings (guests, invited or uninvited) are likely to make an appearance at meals and gatherings.

Do grief, guilt or shame take a seat at (or on) the table?

Do curiosity and connection remain front and center, or hidden in the corners?

Do love and joy encompass the room, or will insecurity and numbness try to crowd them out?

It's possible to make space for one and all, but it may take some planning ahead of time.

And it starts with a guest at the top of the list.

Grace.

Because if grace is present, peace has a chance.

And one way to ensure grace shows up is clear: God...gives grace to the humble. James 4:6

It starts with a private and humble welcoming:

Welcome, welcome, welcome.

I welcome everything that comes to me today because I know it's for my healing.

I welcome all thoughts, feelings, emotions, persons, situations and conditions.

I let go of my desire for power and control.

I let go of my desire for affection, esteem, approval, and pleasure.

I let go of my desire for survival and security.

I let go of my desire to change any situation, condition, person or myself.

I open to the love and presence of God and God's action within. Amen.

-Mary Mrozowski's version of The Litany of Humility

(based on ideas from Jean Pierre de Caussade and Father Thomas Keating)

The welcome prayer invites grace through the door of our hearts, before our homes.

And once grace is welcomed in, other guests can start to arrive and to mingle.

But seating is important, and our positioning is critical:

Take the seat of humility. Luke 14:10

No matter how many seats at the table, choosing the humble seat directly across from grace means staying anchored in grace's presence, even as the feelings (and foods) start flowing.

Gazing at grace naturally allows us to speak grace's language:

Let your gentleness be evident to all. Phil 4:4

Because when gentleness is expressed, all of the (emotions as) guests can relax.

Now, grace whispers.

Allow.

Pain and Presents to co-mingle.

People and Pasts to make a toast.

Problems and Possibilities to befriend each other.

And when grace needs to clink the glass before the meal, it's to get everyone's attention.

Because grace has a special announcement from the Divine Host:

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness." 2 Cor 12:9

It just might silence the room. Because we need these reminders.

Not "over-doing" in our gatherings but simply showing up, messy as we all are with assorted feelings.

Nothing to boast about during our get-togethers but God's power and graciousness in our lives.

Nothing to speak or taste but the mercy and grace we've seen and felt.

And speaking of speaking, grace reminds us:

"Let your conversation always be full of grace, seasoned with salt..." Col 4:6

This begs for a particular dish at the meal for emphasis.

Not just any side-dish, but a special entree.

A friend passed down this dish to me, and it is now a tradition at our Thanksgiving meal.

My friend relished Thanksgivings at her grandfather's home.

Grandpa was a farmer and a corn grower whose cornfields stretched for miles.

Grandpa knew about seeds. About soil. And about grace.

And in autumn, at harvest time and season's end, Grandpa would bring in one cob from the field.

He would allow the cob to dry, and then he'd collect the dried kernels in a bowl.

The bowl of kernels was placed at the center of the Thanksgiving table.

During Thanksgiving, he would pass the bowl around the table, allowing fingers to mingle in the amber kernels.

Each guest was invited to gather a pinch or a handful of kernels to place by their plates.

After the blessing, each guest would finger a kernel while speaking a particular gratitude of the past year. 'Round the table, kernels were held up individually as memories were spoken.

Light from flickering candles on the table would almost illuminate the kernels as they were held high.

Each kernel spoken was representation:

Recollection of God's goodness.

Reflection of God's timing.

Reminder of God's provision.

Reconnection of God's people, those gathered at the table and beyond.

It's now one of our most treasured traditions.

Because we need to speak truth to ourselves, to each other, and especially to our feelings:

our lives are stories of grace!

"It's about grace, the unexpected and unearned.

It's about free gifts given to the most undeserving people."- John Kselman

How could we not be in awe?

Happy Thanksgiving and Thanks-Living.

And be prepared, because making a practice of inviting grace at any meal may have you imitating a preacher's favorite way to describe life:

"Every day a holy-day and every meal a banquet."